Son Needs Help

by Annie
(Location Undisclosed)

I previously submitted my own story but this concerns my son. Although in his 30's now, my son suffered mental and physical abuse at the hands of his father as a young child. His father is a total narcissist (and possibly psychotic).

The mental abuse, manipulation and subsequent thefts from my son continued into adulthood and affected him deeply. My son blocked this from his memory and can remember nothing of his earlier life. Because my son and I are very, very close we have discussed this and the things that happened. 3 or 4 years ago my children discovered that their father was involved in child pornography and was abusing his step daughter. Both my children have subsequently banned their father from their lives and have absolutely no contact. My son's wife was also stalked and sexually harassed by my ex.

My problem is that suddenly my son is reacting to certain things totally irrationally and withdrawing from his family and friends as well as from his wife. He is under unbelievable pressure in his work and has told me he is feels that he is on the verge of a breakdown. I also know that the situation with his father has been eating at him and that he wants to confront him. I feel that any confrontation would just make him feel worse. His father denies he did anything wrong and "I can't understand what I did so wrong that my mother and children cannot forgive me" (his words). By the way, I don't know why he mentioned his mother because she doesn't believe anything bad about him although she was also a victim to theft from him.

I am almost positive that my son's experiences with his father is affecting his current behaviour and I need help in how to make him understand this and get help.