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Mar 28, 2017
 To Annie:
by: Darlene - Webmaster

Annie, all I can do is give you a space here to vent the frustration and desperation you must be feeling.

There is no way to make your son get the help he needs or to make him see something he is unwilling to see. He's a 30-year-old grown man. All you can be for him is an influence. You can try an intervention, but you'll need others around you to do this, and there is never any guarantee that such a thing would actually work. Do the best you can do to talk to him. Make sure others who can't protect themselves have protection. If your son wants to confront his father, all the convincing in the world isn't going to stop him. What he'll do instead is learn to resent you if you interfere too much. Talking is one thing. Going to great lengths to convince someone not to do something is another thing all together. Even if your motives are well-intended. There comes a point in every mother's life where she must let the chips fall where they may with her children. As seemingly impossible as that sounds, I know you know in your heart it's true.

Always be there for him when he needs to talk. And avoid telling him I told you so if things go awry when he does confront his father. And for your own sanity, try to find a way to make peace with whatever the outcome. That's all I can offer.

I send you healing energy, Annie.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir

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