Relationship Violence Story From Jarde

by Jarde
(Location Undisclosed)

Guys never loved me: 
It all starts at 11 my first guy he use to treat me like dirt he loved but then he didnt i was the smallest out of all my friends and he would tell me how my cousin was prettyer then me and looked better i thought i was ugly he left me when i refused to have sex with him.

Then when i was 13 i started dating a guy he said he loved me but he was very controlling. I couldnt dress a certain way i couldnt go places and hang out with certain. so then we began to have sex if i didnt want to do it he would hit me which am a very small girl and he was big i would cry for hours and then suck it up. Then we broke up.

Then i met another boy i loved him with all my heart but he didnt feel the same he would cheat,lie and everything sometimes he would leave me for weeks and never talk to me which made me depressed i tried to hurt myself i didnt want to be alive he mental made me feel like i wasnt worth anything and he made me feel like no guy would ever wanna love me. then one day i found he new my friend and he was messing with her behind my back and she also was biggier then me to he told he didnt date me beacuse he was embrassed of me. I craved to have guys attention cuz my parents werent giving it to me i am a middle child my older sister was bad and eneded up prego that they thought i was next my younger brother is very soft so he gets baby and then there was me left all alone felt like i wasnt loved. then my sister had her baby and would make me watch it well she went out. i was 11 trying to feed a 2 month 2:00 in the moring i begged my mom to take him finally she did...as this goes on i have so much angrey and hate in me but this is what helps me make it through this world. If i can survive the mental,physical and emtoinal abuse i can do anything but i will all ways have the scars and i will never be able to trust a man again.