Relationship Violence Story From Byron

by Byron
(Location Undisclosed)

Abused by my boyfriends: 
When I was around 13 I started to be attracted to other guys,but never told anyone because they would treat me different and calls me names because I'm a bisexual male. When I was younger my two older brothers would have sex with me and I would do it back but I didn't know it was wrong.. then my other brother took me to the park and did anal on me. So I think I've just been attracted to guys by that. From 13 as I started to get older I got more attracted to guys and my closest guy friends acting as if I didn't like them. But I also liked girls too. When I got in the 9th grade I met my two best friends now,let's call them S-- and D--. Well they allways were talking about girls and sex and stuff like that,and I would allways lie to this day that iave had sex with girls to not be left out. Have had girlfriends but nothing serious,been single for bout three years and I hate I hate myself and wish to die sometimes,resorting to me to cut myself now and then to this day. But I got to the point with them where they almost founded out I was bi but they dropped it and believed my lie. I always was attraacted to S-- and just loved him. But he would always hit me. Nothing serious but he made me very serious,he's taller and really buff. I'm kinda short and kind of fat and I think I'm distgusting and what girl wants me. I feel like an outcast because I haven't been through the stages that most teens go through and myself for that. D-- was always cool but we argue a lot and he hits me too. I never smoked and stuff but they influenced me too.in 9th grade is where I got my first bf,he's was 18 while I was 15 he was real nice at the beginning and he was thuggish. I am black and indian and he was white. So one day we were kissing and he tried to have sex with me and I said no and he started to beat on me grab my hair and bash it into things kick me punch me in the face and I was screaming and crying and he just smiled so after a while of beating I just let him have sex with me. We dated for about three more months and he would beat me throught those months and I would have bruises and black eyes and tell my parents that I would get into a fight or fall or something. When I would go see him I would lie to my parents about where I was going I would say I'm going to my friends house, I would have him pick me up from somewhere though. Afetr this,I've always had a lot of friends in school and people though I was funny I didn't get good grades all the time,but after the abuse I started to be by myslef and keep to myslef and hang with myself,and all my friends said I changed. And I lost most,but I didn't get good grades at my school and I had to switch schools and S-- was at the school too,I would always stare at him when he wasn't looking,and I started to get good grades. About two months after my break up with my boyfriend I got another boyfriend and he was 21 and were together till this day.he's hit me a couple of times,he's white and mexican and thuggish. He would tell me to do something and I would take too long and he would hit me punch me in the face slap me down. and I would always forgive him and stay with him. And one time I tried to leave him and he pulled a gun out on me and said if I ever leave him hell killl me and pistol whipped me to the ground. One time he protected me though,once I went with him to do a drug trade and him and the other got into a fight and I tried to jump in and break them up and I got pistol to the ground on my head and knocked on concious and the next thing I knew I was in the car. And I've always loved him for protecting me. But things got worse when he hit me,he slams my face into things and just hurting me a lot more but I still always forgive him and love him. He's now 22 and I'm 16 but no matter how much he hurts me I could never leave him or call the cops on him or anybody that does bad things to me even if they close to killing me. I'm living a life of bisexual male and keeping it from my closest friends.

Relationship Violence Story From Byron Part 2

by Byron
(USA)

I know there is no point of me telling this, because i wont leave the problem. But i just feel like i need to tell someone, because i cant tell my friends or family. And the people that do know only make the situation worse, putting me down calling me stupid for staying for staying with him and other people also say i like to get to abused. But i dont, the only reason i stay with him is because the relationship we have, and i wouldnt change it for anything. About three months ago our relationship has gone downhill and the abuse is worse than ever. He hits me for no reason at times, or if hes mad hell take it out on me. He switched the lock to a small dark closet so that the lock is outside and not inside and he throws me in there sometimes and when i get scared or freak out and bang on the door he gets mad and beat on me by banging my head to the wall pnching me in the face or kicking me in my stomach or ribs. The thing i hate most is when he pins me down to the floor on my back and holding both my hands above my head with one hand, while with other either punching me or sufficating me. And i cant do anything about it and i feel so helpless and just cry because i know whats about to happen. And if i struggle or give him a hard time hell beat me even more. So i usually just keep my distance from him and try to avoid him. By the way im a bi male 16 y/o. And my bf is mexican/white 22 y/o. I remember when he told me he needed a break from and i felt so heart broken, and just sad and depressed for a while. And i decided to get bold with him wasnt a really good idea. He called me and was arguing with me about something but i forgot about what, and i told him " you said u needed a break from me so you do you and ima do me and if i wanna talk to somebody i will. And he came to house was yelling at me just calling me evry name " you stupid pice of sh*t, your not better than me, i would beat your a**, you stupid bit** who do you think you is, you aint sh*t nig** dont forget that do i make myself clear, :'-(
Me: yes. And he took me to his house and beat the shi* out me. I ended up in the hospital for three weeks with a dislocated shoulder, a broken rib a broken wrist, minor concussions. But after that i broke up with, and he kept saying sorry, and i avoided his calls and contact with him. But something happened thought i never would, he changed. But what made it good to me, was that he changed for me, he never changed for noone and for me i felt special for the first time. That was the best thing that ever happened to me. And we got back together. And the fourth of july was hell for me. We went to his family reunion, and he got really drunk( his family doesnt know about our realtionship and thinks hes still straight and told them i was a friend and 18) and there was weed and acohol there and i did them and i felt really dizzy and his cosusin came over to me and said arent you --- friend and i said yes and he wrote his number on my arm but idk why at that moment. Then i sat down and he came over and was all over me and i told him to stop that hes drunk and wasted and he kept coming on to me and he saw his cousin number on my arm and grabbed me by my wrist and said wtf is this why the f*** is his number on you and we were arguing and he was gripping tight and pulled my back and i fell and he started yelling and screaming in my face and his family got him off me. Then he calmed down and called me to a tree and we started to kiss and make up and he asked me aboutt the number agin i tried to walk away and he grabbed me by the same wriest and harder and threw me againt the tree. Then he grabbed me by my neck and was whispering you f***ed up, wait till we get home and told me to go to the car, and i did. And when i got there i texted his cousin and he came to the car and wrapped my sprained wrist for me and we were talking. And he knew about our relationship and he told me he like me and i deserve better and thats wrong for him to treat me like that and he would never do that hes 18 y/o. And he started to kiss me and i stopped him and i said i couldnt and he understoop and apologized. And then he left back to the party. And my bf came and said what was he doing in the car in with me and i said nothing just talking. And he asked to see my phone and i said no. Then he snatched it from me and saw the text messages but nothing about what went on. And he pushed ne and i fell wedged in the back of car wedged in between the seat and the floors and he started to pound me and i just sat there and cried. And when we got home we fought more and then we smoked weed and had make up sex and he said sorry and weve been good for a while and we started to argue again and fight. And thinking it over i think i should be treated better but i really love him and wont leave him we have good and bad times but i just think for the best.