Comments for Not Exactly a Child Abuse Story From Jessica13

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Jun 18, 2010
Jessica:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

You're right in your assessment of this; it's not considered child abuse due to the circumstances and your ages. What's important though are the effects you've been left with, but what's equally important is the self-talk you keep giving yourself. What happened happened, Jessica. There is nothing you can do to change it. But if you continue to beat yourself up about some choices you made as a child, a vulnerable and impressionable child you will never get past it. Please talk to someone. Consider some form of counselling. Start telling yourself that what happened was NOT dirty, YOU'RE (I'M) not dirty, you (I) DON'T have anything to be ashamed of or feel guilty for. For goodness sake, forgive yourself; that's the key to getting beyond this and moving forward with your life. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir


Jun 19, 2010
Most children in the innocence are curious about their bodies:
by: Maurice

Sure you have given yourself the true answer: Darelene the professional and the expert with her woman's heart has certainly said the truth to you from her heart: Why are you so about it?? The answer is out there from a counsellor/therapist and naturally from a family member: preferably Momsy: or your extended family like Auntie's: but also with you girlie friends whom you trust: even you boyfriend if he values you and respects you and your feeling will put it all in perspective: I can and do appreciate your personal slight guilt feeling around it all: But, But Jessica you are a highly intelligent girl and I know you'll be fine: God knows and if when you stop and really think back you'll find many little girls and boys were innocently curious about the workings of their own bodies and that of others at 8/9 years of age: But the effects have remained with you a little longer: Hi look in that mirror and see that wonderful and beautiful young lady/woman looking back at you: Think Positive: Be positive and act positive in all you do and say to that well adjusted young woman: Now also get out there being active and alive in taking part with people your own age and gender in sporting and cultural activities: This will open up your mind and your thinking: Have a healthy mind in a healthy body: you are gifted and tallented in your own right and what better way to grow up naturlly and healthily but taking part with others: You'll make great friends and you'll have compannions for life among your team mates: Be safe, stay safe always be in charge of your own destiny: Love and respect yourself and your body and make sure others value and respect you: NOW off your bottom, find a counsellor and believe in all Darlene said to you in her loving comment to you:

Jun 22, 2010
Something like that happened to me
by: Bex

Something similar did happen to me and this is the first time I've ever shared this story. A girl, named Ann who lived up the street from me, and who's house I frequented, invited me into her bedroom. In there she asked if I ever masterbated. At the time, I didn't even know what that word meant. And no, I hadn't. She lead me into her parents' bedroom, opened a drawer, and took out what I now know was a vibrator. Back in her bedroom, she removed her shorts and panties, and Ann lay down on the floor. She then used the vibrator on her vagina. I found this odd and scary. I soon made an excuse to escape. Before I did, she led me to her basement where she opened a large freezer and offered me a large Cadbury chocolate bar. I hadn't ever seen one of those either.


Since then I have wondered where she learned this. We were around 8, if I remember correctly. I suspect from her brother who was many years older. Srangely, I had never met him. Taking one or two magazines back to her room, she used one to look at while masterbating in front of me. Again ahe offered a treat of a Cadbury chocolate bar and I left, vowing never to return to her house again and I am pretty sure I didn't.

I later experienced sexual abuse from my older brother and told no one about it until just a few years ago when I discovered a younger sister also suffered abuse from him. This experience upsets me too much so I will share it at a later date.

Thank you all for reading this.

Jul 20, 2010
I know the feeling
by: Anonymous

I have expierenced something like this too. A close family friend who was a few years older than me at the time would convince me to do things with her but with clothes on, it became a routine between us everytime we saw one another. It finally stopped but then i met another girl and i was still young and it felt good so we would often hump on eachother. I told her it felt wrong and to stop but she wouldn't, i would wake up to her touching me and i would cry. Another one of my friends has touched me when i told them no and i felt so dirty and wrong. I now realize i was taken advantage of and its not my fault its theirs. They used me and thats all i have ever known. but i am coping and so should you, it is often normal to expierment but don;t let it consume you or your relationships with men or other women its not them who did this to you, it was the other person.

Aug 16, 2010
sorry but i had to voice my opinion
by: molly

it kind of offends me for you to say bad and dirty lesbians. what happened to you is NOTHING to be ashamed of. i understand it was traumatic to you, but there is nothing wrong with exploring your sexuality, and there is nothing wrong with feeling pleasure. unfortunately, i cannot take back my early sexual experiences, but they do not make me feel ashamed because i understand that everyone feels ready to take steps at different times. what im trying to say is, please be careful when you say you feel ashamed of doing stuff with a girl. you chose to, nobody made you, and it is very common.

Aug 16, 2010
I hope and pray you have been successful
by: maurice

Jessica 13: I have been away from the site for a number of weeks due to moving house but I am in my new house now 5 days and back with the many friends wonderful people who through the help of Darlene's loving comments are turning their abuse in to empowering themselves to live well: laugh alot and love much especially beginning with the me person: Jessica 13 I have written my heartfelt feelings in a comment to you: I sincerely hope you have moved on: Gotten the help Darlene encouraged you that you would need to put all your feelings into perspective even though what happened between you and your friend would not be categorised as abuse: Never the less you were suffering the effects of it all; I pray all is going better for you now and that you are out and about living a normal life: being active and alive taking part in sporting and cultural activities so you can have a healthy mind in a healthy body: I can: I will: I must: because I am WORTH it; off that bottom of yours Jessica 13

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