Comments for Ear infections as a sign of sexual abuse?

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May 19, 2008
 sexual abuse
by: Kelly

Moved by Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Why did you say that childresn that are sexually abused, one of the physical signs is ear infections?

Here:

https://www.child-abuse-effects.com/sexual-abuse-signs.html

I am just really curious as I was molested but cant remember a lot of things properly, but I did have a lot of the other physical signs, including that.

Thank you

Kelly
May 19, 2008
 To Kelly:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I moved your query to this thread, as I've answered this question for another visitor. My answer is in the body of the original post toward the top of this page.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
May 24, 2008
 Bad ears and abuse
by: Hayley

***Moved by Darlene Barriere - Webmaster***

Hey Darlene, I'm a bit confused about the er infections. I was abused from the age of 9-15, in that time I had about 4 ear infections all in relatively quick succession. I can understand the bed wetting which I did a fair bit of to my mum's disgust! What I don't understand though is why are Ear infections or problems an indicator of possible sexual abuse? I have had two in the last 6/7 months, and have a horrible feeling I am developing another one but I am not being abused anymore.

Thanks

Hayley
May 24, 2008
 To Hayley:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I've answered this question in this thread. When I've got more time, (I've currently got 8 submissions to work on, with more arriving every day; I have to prioritize my time) I'll include a link on the information page to this thread.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
May 29, 2008
 Thanks
by: Hayley

Thanks for that Darlene. I never knew that about the anatomy of the ear. I never really had any throat infections, though kind of knew that the throat was connected to the ears, (Hence Ear Nose and Throat surgeons). Perhaps I should have told my parents instead of letting their golden boy terrorise me, especially as he kept making me give him oral sex. Yuk.

Thanks again
Feb 12, 2009
 Ear Infections...
by: Holly

The article says that ear infections are uncommon in children and infants. This may be a typographical error. Ear infections are very common in infants and becomes less common as the child grows. There are many contributing factors in ear infections, including colds, flu, allergies, swimmers ear, malformations of the ear canal and injury. That is not saying that sexual abuse may not be one of them, but certainly not the primary one.

Note from Darlene: Thank you for catching that typo, Holly, and for taking the time to write me about it. I have now corrected the page. If you do go back to revisit the page and it still shows up with the incorrect text, a Refresh of the page using your tool bar should bring up the corrected one. Again, thank you.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Feb 23, 2009
 ear infections/abuse
by: Anonymous

I have been researching articles on abuse and came across this page which has been very helpful. My son has told his teacher about physical and sexual abuse and then has told a social worker after an interview but nothing has been done as the social worker says there is no safety issues and has had me send him back for visitations with the person my son told them did it to him. My son is now 7 but has been telling me things since he could barely talk. But as I read the ear infection information I have never heard this before and my son is right now suffering once again from an ear infection, he has had numerous ones over the years. Is there any way to figure out if this is really connected?
Feb 24, 2009
 To Anonymous:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I have had to suspend my Ask Darlene feature on this site because of an overwhelming number of submissions of every possible kind. I'm very sorry, but there aren't enough hours in the day for me to continue to respond to visitor questions. I thank you for your understanding.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Jun 09, 2009
 confused
by: Anonymous

I have reported my daughter to child protection service. cause she told me her father touched her. they did a checked everything even took her to a specialties and he said she was not in anyway been touched. my daughter has come back from her father's after a weekend( almost every weekend) with all but 2, that you have listed on your page signs on sexual abuse. one time she had blood he called me and told me she fall off her bike.she is behind in school. but they school is letting her go to the next grade even though she can't read yet. k to first grade. i have no idea what to do. when they checked on my daughter and then asked her father questions they told me that he checks out find cause he has everything in order. i pray everyday that he is not doing it and he is protecting her. I have tried asking her. she gets quiet or ignores me. i have asked her if her and daddy have a secret and she says yes and tells me that they went hurting or played outside. i think with all the signs of it. i am going crazy cause of how child protective services and the cops had treated it. aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh maybe i am going crazy i am just scared that one day she will come home and tell me her father is being evil and not doing he a father should be doing. when i was little it happen to me but by an uncle so i am a little over protective and watchful of my little girl. i let her explore her world but i go outwith her instead. like the park or the zoo i am right next to her all the way having a second childhood, cause i am so scared.
Jun 10, 2009
 To Anonymous with titled "Confused"
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

If you really and truly suspect your daughter's father, then stay vigilant. Report anything new. Resist the urge to interrogate your daughter beyond what you've already asked her, otherwise she will either shut down or begin to think that in order to get you to stop she'll have to tell you what she thinks you want to hear. You certainly don't want that. What you want is truth. Just make sure she understands that she can come to you to talk about anything at any time, and you will listen; model that at ALL times so that she knows it to be true. You are doing the best you can to protect her. You really are. Which is what you are supposed to do as her mother. What it appears did not happen for you as a child. I do hope you have a support system in place for yourself.

A Video Reading by Darlene Barriere
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Aug 20, 2009
 ear infections permanent ?
by: Anonymous

My husband now 65 has had problems with ear infections all our married life 44 years. He has just recently told me of the sexual abuse perpetrated on him as a young child from age 5 to 10 by a boy 5 yrs older than him. I am now wondering if there is a connection
Dec 28, 2009
 Blood in Urine
by: Kay Kay

I was wondering how that could indicate sexual abuse? I Thank you ahead of time for you reading my question and answering it. Thanks - Kay kay
Dec 29, 2009
 Kay Kay:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I'm no longer in a position to answer visitor questions. I thank you for your understanding.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Oct 19, 2010
 Ear Infections/Adenectomy as sign of Sex abuse
by: Anonymous

In my experience, I developed severe swelling of the adenoids when I was 3-1/2 years old. The doctor had to do an adenoectomy (but no tonsils were removed, only adenoids). He said to my mother, "I have never seen so much stuff in a child this size." He meant bacteria and mucous, preventing me from breathing. I also had an ear infection.
Looking back, when this problem occured, I had been forced to orally take in an uncle's male part into my mouth, and the stuff he gave off when finished with me. I could not tell my parents what had happened at aunt and uncle's place...it was like a weird nightmare and then I was strapped to a chair and duct-taped mouth when aunt said, "you are never, never, never gonna tell." I never did, until I was 25 yrs old, my parents didn't believe me, or about step-grandma so I have now divorced them both rather than be re-victimized by their denial and emotional abuse. Now 49 years old and reasonably happy.
Nov 29, 2010
 ear infection
by: Anonymous

what about an infection due to saliva from the molester? there are disgusting kisses involved...
May 29, 2011
 Post from Hayley
by: Anonymous

In Hayleys post she mentions bed wetting. I also suffer from bed wetting and was a victim of sexual abuse. I was just wondering if my bed wetting has anything to do with it
Jun 08, 2011
 questions
by: Anonymous

Is there any place I can go online and put in the things I have observed and get a response as to whether the things I see are normal or suspect?
Sep 07, 2011
 HELP - PLEASE READ
by: Worried Grandmom

HELP I'm very worried and confused. My 3 yr old grandson (only grandchild) said the below to me ... and then after he said this my daughter asked me to leave and that I couldn't see my grandson again. I was shocked. I'm just now starting to put 2+2 together after reading and researching here. I've been a huge part of my grandsons life and we have a close bond. He must feel so hurt and as though I abandoned him. This is awful.

He had just turned 3-yrs old and we were both sitting on his bedroom floor, alone in his bedroom, playing with puzzles. There were puzzle pieces everywhere, scattered about and a pile between his outstretched legs, and mine as well. As he reached over right between my lower legs to snap a puzzle piece into the puzzle that was on the floor between my outstretched legs (I was wearing long sweat pants) he instead suddenly and unexpectedly pulled himself up to my crotch and put his head and his face right up to my crotch and then moved back and to my shock said,

"I know you don't have you peewiod (period) Gamma, cause I know girls get their peewiod and have blood in there bagina (vagina) and I can smell the blood and you don't have no blood and you don't have you peewiod gamma".

As I got up to talk to my daughter about what he said, before I could do so, my daughter immediately decided I could no longer have contact with my grandson ... just like that ... after 3 solid years of caring for him and closeness with my grandson. My daughter is 33-yrs old and has all of the signs of narcissism. She is well educated, but she is emotionally immature and NPD.

Her wimpy husband is another story. He's not home a lot as he travels for his work.

I've not had contact with my grandson for over 3 months (I normally see him every 4 days or 2x per week) as I'm awaiting court mediation date.

I have just starting putting things together and realizing this could be more serious than I originally thought. At first I had assumed maybe he walked into the bathroom when my daughter was changing her tampon/pad and saw the blood, but I was shocked he said this and still sensed something wasn't quite right. But, I didn't know exactly what might be the problem until I recently started researching child sexual abuse. I am stunned and terribly upset.
Sep 07, 2011
 HELP - PLEASE READ
by: Worried Grandmom

PART 2 ---
But, now that she still refuses to allow me any further contact, for no valid reason whatsoever -- it's way too suspicious. My grandson was starting to talk more and more and to articulate things that she didn't want me to know. That explains why she doesn't let him stay with anyone and why she doesn't leave his side when visiting my mom or sister. She controls the conversation flow. I now think this might be why she said she didn't want me around anymore ... without any valid reason. I wonder if maybe she knew my grandson was going to start to tell me things she doesn't want me to know. He speaks well now and is very credible.

Please share your thoughts. I am dying here. I do not know what to do. They live 15-minutes away. I am not allowed over their home as per her "orders". Mediation is set for sometime late September. Please advise.
May 01, 2016
 Ear infections
by: Anonymous

I as a child had ear infections routinely, and even though I do not remember my step father ever choking me with his penis, it did happen for many years. When I was 10, I had tubes put in my ears to stop the infections, and a year later this guy was out of our life. I have only had two earaches since, now at 57 yrs of age. Very interesting to know this may of been the cause for many nights awake and crying in pain from the ear pain.

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