Comments for Child Abuse Story From MG

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Aug 31, 2008
 A very honest post...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

MG, your story shows how deeply and adversely affected you were—ARE—with the way your mother chose to "discipline" you. The issue of your sexuality and the humiliation you felt being so exposed, both literally and "phallically," likely resulted in the deepest scar of all. Even though society might not regard the spankings as physical abuse—a position I do not support—there is no question that you suffered emotional abuse. That emotional abuse has resulted in a difficult relationship with your aging mother today. Your story shows all too clearly that parents need to understand that the discipline they impose on their children today can and do lead to life-long relationship challenges between the parents and their adult children.

In your story, you eluded to bearing the brunt of your mother's distress of the divorce with your father. If you haven't already, you might find my article on this site Why parents target a specific child for abuse of interest. You may find support on the way you view your mother's actions in that article. Another page to check out offers a comparison between Abuse and Discipline.

Also, another contributor (Mark) posted a comment that I treated as an article on this site, one that you might find supportive. You'll find it at Lessons Learned From Spanking: An Issue of Child Abuse.

MG, it might interest you to know that a recent study showed that mothers who used implements such as belts, paddles and switches to spank their children were 9 times more likely to report harsher forms of discipline that were consistent with physical abuse. And although media attention and educational attempts are bringing to light the dangers and adverse effects of spanking, the report also shows that up to 90% of parents still spank their 3- to 5-year-old children at least occasionally. I'm delighted to learn that you are among the 10% who don't, MG. The lesson YOU learned was how damaging spanking can be. You have much to be proud of. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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