Comments for Child Abuse Story From Martin

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Apr 11, 2011
 Martin:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I believe you when you say you've written the "Reader's Digest version" of what you endured as a little boy, and indeed, as an adolescent and then as a full grown man. With all those bruises and breaks, with the obvious signs of abuse, it breaks my heart that no one stood up for you: not a teacher, not a neighbour, not another family member; no one. As a woman with a strong sense of maternal instincts, I just want to put my arms around the little boy who was Martin, the little boy who was sobbing , knowing he'd be beaten for eating corn in the basement because he was starving. She was a beast, Martin. A seriously troubled, twisted beast. The fact that you had the presence of mind to realize that killing her would result you her continuing to have power over you is a testament to your inner strength. The fact that you allowed her back into your life when she was dying is a testament to your ability to be compassionate, even when such malice was thrown at you by her. I wish you all the best along your road of healing and recovery, Martin, and I thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Apr 11, 2011
 Right on!
by: AnonymousT

You wrote: "We can choose not to give them that control any longer and rise up and have a happy life anytime WE WANT"

Yes, yes, YES! You are correct & I'm so sorry you had to go through so much in life to see this. I don't know why but when I read a story like this ... I want to pull my son out of school just to hug him. Of course...that would embarass him, nonetheless hugging the hurt away is my first instinct.

I commend you for the growth you've done & the healing you wished to aquire...& then made it happen. Bravo!

T
Apr 12, 2011
 Even animals would never treat their young so sadistically
by: Anonymous

Martin, I can't believe that your dad left you and your siblings to the so-called care of that sick, sadistic monster of a mother, even allowing her to beat, torture and berate you guys everyday...how dare he! She is a truly sadistic brute and she should've been locked up for even those barbaric beatings that she subjected you guys to. Oh, and she is wrong. You are not worthless; you are worthy of love, dignity and respect, all of which you were sadistically denied of. Oh, and you were given a raw, crappy deal because she was so twisted that she didn't even know how to take care of herself, not to mention be a mother to you. She didn't know how to love even herself; all she ever knew was hate, so she should've known better and loved and cherished you. Oh, and people who treat others the way you were treated often do it out of jealousy because they could never be such a shining star that you are. Oh, and she was a coward too because only a coward would do such despicable things like that to such an innocent, helpless little boy you once were. Oh, and she should've had the courage to seek professional help instead of abusing you. The path that she chose was inexcusable. Oh, and you are not to blame for her sadistic, ignorant behavior; she was and still is to blame because she chose to torture and abuse you. You were the child; she was the adult; she had all the power and she only misused that power over you. Oh, and mothers who abuse their own children are, in fact, one of the real abusers. I really hope that you are in a safe place now and that you try counselling.
Apr 12, 2011
 Hearts speak to each other Thank You: hugging the hurt away my natural instict.
by: maurice

Martin: " what" a man your story sure brought out the most natural instict in Darlene her maternal instict: Also in Anonymous T and me: I quote you Martin because these words gave me real hope and real inspiration: One can turn one's pain into empowering others: The moral of my story is pain inflited on us by others need not end our lives: We can choose not to give them that control any longer; rise up and have a happy life anytime we want: Martin Thank You: empowering words for me this day: Martin your inner belief and strength to not stick that knife in the one who as Darlene puts it so honestly, truthfully, because it is the truth A seriously troubled twisted beast: While speaking with a few friends intimately who mothered children: Thay told me no one will ever know the pain of child bearing: I am a firm believer no abuser knows the pain with it's effects our abusers inflicted on us: God knows whatever form of abuse to the lesser or greater degree that it was inflicted is the same for each one individually: The great blessings I receive from this Site is knowing I have great and good friends who empatise with me I and I can with them: All mothers can empatise with each other: Martin you give hope to many when you say: I am now mostly happy, Mostly sane 15 years drug and booze free and loving life: MUch Thanks Friend: You are a winner over the one who abused you: Darlene is too that is why she empowers each of her visitors with her affirming heart expressed words: LOVE being at the center of her knowing, her empathy, her re-assuring and accepting the truth and the genuineness in the telling of each of her visitors: One big family in my understanding and belief she has made us all: Martin live well: laugh alot: Love much: you give me great courage to accept ME and hope that life is worth living TODAY after the years when I was not free to be me: Thank YOU
Apr 17, 2011
 With gratitude
by: Aidan

Thank you, your story touched me. I can really relate to your evperience of getting a sibling in trouble to save one's self. My sister's amd I were always competeing for scarce resources and would have temporary relief while another was the focus of my parent's wrath. I have never heard anyone elae speak of this phenomena before. It helps to know I was not the only one who experienced this.
Sep 24, 2011
 Survivor
by: Bridget G

Hey bud' i'm so sorry for the s**t your sick-in-the-head mother put you and your siblings through! )):
As for your brother who took out his own life,
may he rest in paradise. <3

You have but one life to live so make the most out of it and don't take s**t from anybody else ever again. You weren't born a door mat so don't let any other scums step on you.

Stay strong bud'!

Peace! <3
Dec 17, 2011
 there is something to believe in
by: Anonymous

It's terrible what happened to you, but good that you're not in bondage anymore. How you're life is now should let you know that there is a God to believe in and help you through the hard times. Not everyone is bad, and He won't give you more than you can handle.

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