Comments for Child Abuse Story From Maddison

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Jun 24, 2008
 TELL someone...
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

I agree with your mother that you should stay away from this man's home. But I don't agree with your stance on the rest.

Maddison, the reason your friend's father told you that you were important to him is because he knew what to say to keep you guilt-ridden so that you would NEVER tell. It had nothing to do with how you were such a good friend to his daughter; and you were a good friend to her. Sex offenders like this man know the vulnerabilities of their young victims; he definitely knew yours.

You're assuming your friend's father never hurt her, Maddison; you don't know that for sure. In all likelihood, his IS hurting her. It is quite likely that he is molesting her. He WILL continue to molest other girls whenever given the opportunity. That is the nature of sex offenders: they don't stop until they are MADE to stop.

I understand where you're coming from when you say you are worried that he'll lose his job and/or his daughter. But when you don't act because of such "reasoning" you are making excuses for what he did, for what he will continue to do. I don't believe that you want to live with the guilt after learning that he sexually assaulted another girl, the guilt of knowing that if you had reported what he did to you, your actions could have prevented it from occurring in the first place. I cannot guarantee what will happen when you do disclosed what he did to you, but if you don't Maddison, the repercussions could haunt you for the rest of your life.

Don't bury this. Don't keep it to yourself any longer. Talk to your mother. She can help make a report. She can ensure you get some counselling in order to deal with your understandable fear of men. If you really and truly feel that you can't talk to your mother, then consider speaking with a counsellor at school, or perhaps a trusted teacher. Contact Child Help at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). They are staffed 24/7 with professionally trained counsellors who will listen to you. They are not a reporting agency, but they can help you through the process of reporting. You've taken the first step by writing to my visitors and me through this website, Maddison. Please take the second step: report what this molester did to you and get the help you need for yourself. You're worth it, dear. You really are.

Darlene Barriere
Violence & Abuse Prevention Educator
Author: On My Own Terms, A Memoir
Nov 07, 2008
 Your friends dad.
by: Undisclosed8

You are very brave for telling your story on here but you need to tell someone who can do something to help your friend. What will happen when she invites another friend over? He will do it again! He knows what to say to make children keep quiet, this is almost certainly not the first time he has done this.

I think that your friend was actually trying to protect you, it seems to me that she knew what was happening to you when you were watching the movie. You said she kept looking over, chances are she is usually the one being touched or worse when they watch a movie. I think the fact that she quickly decided that she did not want to watch the movie anymore, and moved you into the computer room shows how much of a good friend you have. Even if she didn't know exactly what was going on she knew you were uncomfortable.

You will never know if he does it to her whenever she is over because chances are she is more scared and ashamed than you and will have a lot of trouble telling.

Please tell, after time it will lift a weight off your shoulders. This painful memory will never go away, but if you tell then in the future you will feel more empowered knowing that you did all you could do for other children in the future.
Sep 03, 2009
 I cannot believe this creep!
by: Furious Dad

Sweetie,

I have a 13 year old daughter and she is very pretty and popular with lots of friends ages 12-15 who are at my house all the time. I always clown around, cook amazing breakfast for everyone, and half of her friends say I am their other Daddy and most of the girls treat me just like their own Dad. We all have a great time and I never get inappropriate with any of them nor will I ever.
No matter the Dad's problems, his first thoughts should have been about his daughter and her feelings towards such things and yours. Grown men see young ladies and can't help but notice they are growing up, but no grown man or Father should stare at, look down shirts, think about, or attempt to touch ANY young girl. It is wrong and that man should be removed from society. I throw all of my daughter's friends in the pool and one time picking up one of the girls my hand slipped and ended up on her butt...I immediately apologized and quit throwing the girls much to their dismay, but I explained to them that they were just getting way too big and it hurt my back. This man touched you repetitively on purpose and he knew that it made you uncomfortable...He didn't get the response that he was looking for so he was doing damage control. You need to tell your parents, the authorities, and make sure this never happens to another friend of hers or her. Because of how risky the situation was (e.g. out on the couch in front of everyone), he has probably done something like that before with someone else. Look at the damage he has caused you already. Now you don't trust adult men to even be close to you. He damaged your sense of safety and security in such a way that your life may never be the same. You must do something about it. At least go to your parents and have them help you. Have a great day and keep your head up. Use this experience to help other young ladies overcome these issues or prevent them. I'm really sorry that you had to experience such a thing. It just isnt fair. God bless.
Dec 25, 2013
 This is my story
by: Maddison

This is my story. I finally reported it in 2012 when I was 16. Since then I am going through the court process. I have a victims advocate, two investigators, a detective, the District Attorney, and an Assistant District Attorney on my side.

I found out that he did this to other girls and one finally pressed charges when she heard another girl (me) was.

I am going to have to testify in front of a jury and I'm still scared. I found positive male role models in my life though and I trust them (although it took a year)I feel safe around them and they call me their little sister.

I'm still not okay...but I'm getting there

My parents still don't know

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