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Mar 17, 2011
 Judy:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

It's not at all unusual for 30-something-year-old to remember abuse/trauma that has been blocked or repressed. The brain can often block out trauma in order to protect the person. As we move through the ages and stages of our lives, triggers occur. In one's 30's and 40's, as a result of those triggers, what can happen is that the mind knows it's now safe to remember. In the moment it doesn't feel safe, because your flooded with memories and the emotions attached to them. It becomes overwhelming. But the fact that you now remember is telling you that your stronger than you realize. Please seek out some form of counseling in order to deal with what you endured as a child. That's the best place to start. I can't give you advise about your daughter...it is beyond the scope of the website. Thank you for sharing your story with my visitors and me.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Mar 17, 2011
 It's totally normal
by: AnonymousT

Once I hit my 30's is when my flashbacks started. We put things away until we are better capable to deal with the past & heal from it, it just seems that's often when a person is in their 30's. It must be THE DECADE for personal awareness or something.
The Courage To Heal was a great book for me.
Healing thoughts for you Judy.

T
Mar 24, 2011
 child abuse as a child causes many hidden agenda's
by: maurice

Because most abusers are not aware that what they do, perpetrate, carry out on the innocent and vunerable child/adolecent sticks in their minds for a very long time: because the child is so vunerable and unknowing that their abusers in what ever forms of abuse they perform on the child can and does have lasting effects which lie dorment in their minds and is only re-awakened when they are well into their 20's/30's and even later years: Darlene: sure has put you right there; so no blaming of yourself: Stop Now: get help: you'll be a winner: Always believe in yourself: Have a friend or two your own age and gender to share your true fellings with: They will help you to blossom Follow Darlene loving words to you: Own them, take them into your heart as well as reading them and act on them: She wants what is the best for you: Do I want what is the best for ME???? I do, I do. I will I can I must because I am WORTH it;
Mar 30, 2011
 Hate through text messages and e mail
by: Judy

Thank you for all that you have shared with me, Yes My doctor sent me to a social worker. I felt like she was judging me more then helping me. I was the one that was abused, and all I hear is I did the best you could. I was a good mom!I can honestly say my daughter did not run because she was abused.She told me she had the best childhood ever!I am not a child abuser. I will scream this to the mountain tops... and now since they have dragged my name through the mud with my daughter while she is going through her troubled teens, she believes all their garbage.They are killing me. And I look like what they are, the abuser. Why else would I be sent to a social worker rather then a counselor? I can not be judged I am too weak, and Know one cares. Not one family member. How do you get past this. I was abused, I lost everyone I ever loved and I mean everyone. Not one person will even get on the phone. And I lost what meant more to me then life itself. My daughter. No one cares. My pain, my problem.Just hang ups and closed doors. It is like history is replaying itself...This is big!
One of the last phone calls I received from my Mom, she said Mr Dad was just letting me live with him, to get to her. Why did I not hear?
The last words I heard from my Mr Dad was, I'll show you, you see how you daughter ran, she will never come back. How do you live with these words ringing in your ear? HOW?
With all my tears, I can't see this getting better! Sorry I just can't,,,The only thing that keeps me going is my other two daughters, they have been here for me, along with my husband.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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