Child Abuse Story From
Shannon2

This child abuse story from Shannon2 page was created February 8, 2007 and was originally posted on January 31, 2007 as story #66.

Shannon is from Millbrook, Alabama, USA

The following child abuse story from Shannon2 depicts physical abuse and emotional abuse.

The child abuse effects on Shannon2: severe depression and ongoing persistent anger.

Child Abuse Story From Shannon2:

My story of abuse is much like others. I lived with physical and mental abuse until I was 16, which is when I moved out of my home. I couldn't take it anymore. Even after that, I still had to deal with the emotional abuse. I am now 27 years old, and so full of anger and hurt that at some moments of my life, I can barely function. I suffer from severe depression and it has taken a toll on my children and my husband.

I've always wanted to confront my parents for what they did, but never had the courage to do so for fear of them cutting me out of their lives. At moments, I could careless if I had anything to do with them. At other times, I cry when I think they are angry at me for anything.

My parents always made me feel like it was my fault that everything happened the way it did. Even now, I hear my mother say, "You're lucky your father didn't beat the shit out of you like his parents did to him." I cringe when she says that because there were times when he did almost beat the life out of me. My father is very strong, and it didn't take much for him to hurt me.

I can remember on one occasion, he was angry at me for something I had done in school. He butted heads with me so hard that not only did I have a goose egg on my head for several days, but it caused me to bruise beneath my eyes. I went to school, and when asked, I told them I had hit my head on the door. It was a sufficient enough answer for them.

I also recall an incident where I had done something to make my mom angry, and she whipped me with something; I think a thin belt. She hit me over and over until my butt was bleeding. I was bruised for days. I shuttered every time I had to sit down. It gave new meaning to 'beat you till you can't sit down'.

My mother and I hated each other when I was growing up. Or I should say she hated me. I wanted a relationship with her so badly, but I really felt as though she resented me ever being born. She couldn't stand for me to be in the same room as her, and she hated it when my father was being nice to me. Sometimes I think she was jealous of the relationship that my father and I had.

At one point in my life, my father was very good to me and we were very close. As I got older, they joined forces and I felt that they both hated me. Sometimes I still feel that way.

A few months back, my mom and I started having heart to heart emails. She told me that she wanted me to be open with her and be honest about my feelings. I did, but only to an extent. If my father had ever gotten the inkling that I was upsetting my mom, he would have dealt with it very severely. So I picked and chose my words carefully. I expressed to her that growing up, I felt as though she hated me. At one time in my life, she had even told me that she wished I was never born. I let her know this had hurt my feelings. She proceeded to tell me that she was sorry for making me feel that way, and the only reason she did it was because her mother had done the same thing to her. So my question now is, why am I being punished for what YOUR mother did to you? I haven't asked her that question yet, but I am curious to know the answer. Since that conversation, we haven't spoken much.

Till this day, they still blame me for most everything that has happened, because I was a 'bad child'. I was ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) growing up, and I was labelled with many different names. Destructive, promiscuous, pathological liar; just to name a few.

I don't believe I ever did anything bad enough to make my parents treat me the way they did. I always believed you were supposed to love your children unconditionally, no matter what they did. I still believe that with my own children.

I may never be able to confront my parents. But I do know this: I will not let this anger and hurt control my life any long. Today, I am being baptized and I am giving my burdens to God. They are His burdens to deal with now, not mine. It sounds good on paper, but can it really be that easy? I guess only time will tell.

Subscribe to Darlene Barriere's healing blog:

Healing the Body, Mind and Spirit



<< back

References

NOTE: Information pages on this site were based on material from the
Canadian Red Cross RespectED Training Program. Written permission was obtained to use their copyrighted material on this site.

	Enter your search terms Submit search form
	Web www.child-abuse-effects.com

Child abuse story from Shannon2 was re-formatted June 10, 2015