This
child abuse story from Rin page was created June 26, 2007 and was originally
posted on June 13, 2007 as story #147.
Rin
is from Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA
The
following child abuse story from Rin depicts: extreme physical abuse and
emotional abuse
The child abuse effects on Rin: broken, fractured and dislocated bones, internal injuries that required a lengthy hospital stay, depression, nightmares, didn't fit in at school and was bullied, extremely low self-esteem, suicidal
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My story started after I turned five. My father was
allowed to start drinking after being on probation for five years. With alcohol
came abuse. First, he would go after my mother, but it wasn't long afterwards
that he began turning his abusive ways towards me and my younger sister.
It was a strange change from the person I once
knew, a kind, loving, devoted father, to this alcoholic monster that blamed my
mother and myself for his lack of job. He said we deserved it because my mother
had cheated on him as "that's what Spics do".
My mother didn't know that there was anything
better out there; she had divorced one abusive man, only to marry another.
However, her wake-up call came when I was eight.
The abuse had gone from a small smack across the
face to a whipping once in which I had been tied down to the bed, face down and
whipped with a belt until my back was in ribbons. That day, when I was eight, I
was taken to the hospital and hospitalized for three months. The damage
included two broken ribs, a broken wrist, fractured cheekbones, a dislocated shoulder,
and numerous internal injuries, one of which has almost guaranteed that I will
not be able to have children of my own.
In the time that I was in the hospital, my mother
filed for divorce, and he left our lives forever. However, that didn't end the
problems.
My sister became angry and turned to drugs, while I
became depressed, haunted by nightmares. I was singled out in school because I
didn't talk to anyone. I just didn't fit in. I was bullied by both boys and
girls, even to the point that I was humiliated by my first crush when I was 14.
After that, I decided life wasn't worth living and attempted suicide. I failed
and was never treated for it, so I was sent home in a worse state than before.
In total, I attempted suicide three times and have the scars from them all.
Things, however, began to slightly look better when I was accepted to a new
charter school.
At this time, my mother became infatuated with her
new "boyfriend" and moved out of home just before I was sixteen. She
began to only support us financially and began berating and degrading
everything I did. Any of my accomplishments were not good enough. She has even
said that I am a "mistake", an "accident" and how she
wishes I was never born because I'm such an embarrassment.
My sister began turning her anger towards me. She
was the more aggressive one, while I was too passive. Our age difference isn't
large enough for me to fight her off; she's only a year younger than I am. But
to her, I was the weaker of the two of us, so I needed to be made the servant.
If I disobeyed her, I'd be beaten, like my father had done. Once, she managed
to break another rib of mine, which still hasn't healed right.
During this time, I managed to form a close-knit
group of friends whom I considered my family. When things got to be too bad at
home, I would stay with one of them for a few days or a couple of weeks before
I'd go back to my house and back to the abuse my sister would inflict. Still,
it was only them that kept me sane enough to be able to endure it.
Something that gave me hope came from my friend
Toshi, who had moved here a couple of years ago from Japan, and who was
teaching me Japanese. I had stayed with him for nearly a month when he decided
on giving me a new name. Because I couldn't read the character well, it came
out Rin, but the name stuck. He told me to use it when I could start my life
over. As in a way of rebirth.
Things changed when I met my boyfriend. After one of the incidents with my sister, he had me move in with him just after Halloween. I had just turned 19. I've been here ever since. He's been reassuring me against my fears that he will never raise a hand against me, that no, he won't leave me because I'm not good enough, that he's glad I'm here with him and that he loves me very much. I do annoy him sometimes by becoming too clingy and wanting too much affection. I still constantly apologize for everything and I feel like it's my responsibility to be able to handle everything, and I get nervous when I can't do it. Anyone that isn't in my close circle of friends, I always view with suspicion and often don't end up trusting them until they prove that they aren't there to hurt me. Still…life has gotten so much better, and I'm glad for it.
Healing the Body, Mind and Spirit
NOTE: Information pages on this site were based on material from the
Canadian Red Cross RespectED Training Program. Written permission was obtained to use their copyrighted material on this site.
Child abuse story from Rin was re-formatted June 8, 2015
From Victim to Victory
a memoir
How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life
From Victim to Victory
a memoir
How I got over the devastating effects of child abuse and moved on with my life
Jan 30, 18 01:13 PM
Jan 29, 18 11:33 AM
Jan 29, 18 11:00 AM