Comments for Child Abuse - Stop The Violence Stop The Silence

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Apr 16, 2011
 Stephanie:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

Thank you for sharing your story and your so-important message with my visitors and me. Your title is so appropriate. In order to stop the violence, we must first stop the silence. Whether or not you realize this, you DID stop the silence when you opened up to your sister that day. Speaking out, even briefly, resulted in the end of the abuse. I also have to say here that you have nothing to feel guilt or shame for. Nothing at all. This man took advantage of your youth and your vulnerabilities. That's what pedophiles do, Stephanie. Don't allow yourself to apply mature adult values of what you did and didn't do as a little girl. That's not fair to the child you once were. Always remember that blame and shame and guilt are squarely on the shoulders of the man who CHOSE to abuse you, because he chose to abuse you. As for your mother, something is deeply wrong. She can't talk about it, and she can't let you talk about what happened because of something within HER. This has nothing to do with you. But you can break free from that legacy. That fact that you can write is a good thing. Very cathartic. But you do need help with this. Please talk to a school counsellor and find out if there are resources out there that can help you deal with the repercussions. You didn't deserve to be sexually abused. You certainly deserve help for the fact that you were.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Apr 16, 2011
 Stephanie
by: GPM

Good for you in coming forward with what has to be a very difficult revelation. You have taken a giant step in recognizing that your experience, however horrible it was, is going to help you deal with the abuse issue better, and you will also be helping others with the same issue.

I want you to know that there is a great deal of concern about your depression and thoughts of doing something harmful to yourself. Let me say this- you are a very precious part of this world, you are not damaged goods. And as for your mother, she's in denial of the abuse by not wanting to discuss it. If it will cause you no harm, tell her it would benefit both of you to seek counseling together. It might very well be your mother has issues she would rather keep secret that may be affecting her in the same way you've been affected.

Whatever you decide to do, do it for your health and welfare. You are the number one priority right now and that's very important to all of us who read or contribute to this site. Whether you know it or not, you have become a valuable asset to this site. All we want for you is happiness- so let all of the past stay in the past. You get out into this world and grab all the new life you can hold. You deserve all the blessings life has to offer- I'm betting you will get them all too.
Apr 19, 2011
 Don't quit: Don't give up on yourself: Be a winner
by: maurice

STEPHANIE: I know you won't give up on yourself because you are a caring, loving, inspirational message you left with Darlene and her many visitors: Anonymous also gave you hope to live by: Live well: Laugh alot: Love much: ALWAYS BELIEVE IN YOURSELF: Look in the mirror saying positive things about that beautiful body of yours: I like this about etc etc; I love the shape of my etc: instead of I don't etc: then be gentle and kind to your body by massageing it all over with scented oils and creams: MY NEW MOTTO I will: I can: I must: Why you might ask Stephanie???? the answer being, becauise I am WORTH it: Darlene has written her encourageing, supporting, loving, affirming words to you from her heart: Cuddle and hug her concerned words into your heart: take ownership of them: take all the positive loving sentences from Anonymous Comment: no talk of suicide: self harming that body of yours: You are gifted: tallented: with loads to offer to people around you especially from those words you wrote: Hi, begin having a healthy mind in a healthy body, Stephanie get out their taking part in TEAM sports; sporting or cultural activities with like-minded peopkle your own age and gender: you'll make real frinds and make loads of aquaintances who will cheer you up when you meet: You'll be fine Stephanie: Act on Darlene's words to you in her comment: Your motto I WILL: etc.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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From Victim to Victory
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