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Jun 18, 2014
 Lyes:
by: Darlene Barriere - Webmaster

It's been my experience that the way of "letting go" is not to try letting go. Allow yourself to fully feel what you feel about what it is that is keeping you locked in a prison. But it is also changing your perspective about what happened. You are still blaming yourself for not seeing what was happening to him and for not making a difference to what happened to him. What if instead you saw things a little differently. What if instead you saw in yourself what he saw in you: A loving person who cared about him and his well-being. For a brief time in his life, you were his saviour, Lyes. He could turn to you. He could count on you to be there in a supportive role for him. He experienced love with you. Do you not think that that is worthy of hanging onto? Do you not realize how important that was for him? It's not about what ultimately happened and didn't happen. It's about how you were present for him in the moments he turned to you. So the next time you remember what you think you didn't do for him, remember all that you did do for him. You were the one person in his life that loved him. He died being loved. That is a very special space to have held for him. And beyond that, there are ways that you can now ensure that his legacy is not lost in death. You can reach out to others who live in similar situations. You can become an advocate. Volunteer at a boys and girls club. Become a Big Sister. You can't change what happened to him, but you can help change the life of another to ensure it doesn't happen, or continue to happen to someone else. THIS would bring purpose to horrors this young man suffered and endured. He is no longer suffering. No longer a tortured soul. But you still are. But when you find a new perspective and a way to bring purpose into the horrific situation, you'll find that all the negative stuff will let go of you. Thank you for sharing both of your stories with my visitors and me. I send you love, light and healing energy, Lyes.

From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Darlene Barriere
Webmaster: www.child-abuse-effects.com
author. speaker. survivor. coach
From Victim to Victory, a memoir
Jun 18, 2014
 A tortured Soul
by: Anonymous

Hallo, I read your heart wrenching story, I feel so bad for your friend, his short life was so sad, if not for you there would have been no one else for him. You were there for him but he was not your responsability I really hope you can come to terms with his short life and there was nothing that you could have done to prevent what happened. The abusers are to blame not you....never never blame yourself. Any little happiness he experienced came from you. Remember all the good things about him, and do not punish your self:-)
Aug 11, 2014
 Thank you
by: Lyes

Your comments stuck to me @ the core of my heart which use to hold an empty space that I thought would never be fill. I say this with sweet tears of joy and gratitude for I never thought I blame myself and I never thought I've meant that much to him. Thank you as I'm writing I'm still crying. At least with those comments I could start filling the space that became so empty when he left. I love you, thank you again.

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Disclaimer: To the best of my knowledge the child abuse
stories on this site are true. While I cannot guarantee
this, I do try to balance the need for the submitter to be
heard and validated with the needs of my visitors.



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